i was here... okok... longer lar... i went to sch when there's no lesson so i came home to do project n yay! well u can guess the sentence is i did it! yea... oh i still ve other projects... my drawing sucks n im needed to draw comics for MGEP.. haha... i wonder if jerrick can draw while i just tell him my story... hahaha... (oh jerrick's my teammate)
well i tried drawing, it is simply lousy... i ve no talent in drawing, not like kenneth or vincent... crap wat talking me... tml going singing again... haha... cya tml if im gonna update again... lolx...

You have shy beauty.You are pretty intimidated when
it comes to guys(or girls if you're
lesbian).You are a very good friend with the
few you probably have;you don't have a few
because you're selfish or anything but because
you're so shy and prefer not to strike up
conversations.None the less you are a very
beautiful person inside and out:)
Good traits:Caring,kind,a good listener
Bad traits:Secretive,insecure,too quiet


What kind of beauty do you have?(Anime pics)4 girls but boys can take it if they really must
brought to you by Quizilla

when i woke up this morning.. i found out that my life is pretty much de same... cos i had the opposite dream last night which i did not expected. well, when u had the opposite dream of ur life, u actually live another of ur own... and finally yea... it's real... real life sucks.. doesnt it... i plan to be better in my next life... haha.. this life just is gone... unless i really make the changes i want them to be. n in less than a month's time, im gonna be 20... sucks again.. cos it signify the time to grow up... hahaha... oh gosh... i wonder wat i can do in the future... meaning my career, my life... now is just urgh urgh urgh... feels terrible... if i can start afresh, really, i wont be me again.

im so bumped today... dunno whether it's the sickness that make me moody or the relationship im holding onto.. i luv him, i noe he luv me... but our personalities just doesnt match.. now then i realised i haven done much for him.. n i would want to... consider how long and attached these has been... but my head always clouded me in some way... i will try to be more caring, i do... well... now everything seems to be about me now... im the utimate uncaring person one could ever find on earth... y do i even ve a relationship in the first place? or rather y me? im asking the existence of myself... wat do i do for this world? i noe nth... nth abt a living n treacherous life of a normal human being... n now i am... wondering about happily or maybe sadly in my own world... i dun really care wat's going on ard me... who and who is doing wat... y do i care? but now i noe i must try... or else my existence proves nth... i seriously is naive... absolute idiot in the world who doesnt noe wat the hell she's doing... dunno a single thing abt emotions, moods, things revolving ard me, even a little common sense doesnt exist in my tiny little head... im a sad sad loser... i dun really get motivated to do something... cos im just lazy... n to think i go n read that book n nv finish... it's "Emotional guide" to guide urself to think better... and doesnt prove effective for me... cos i dun understand the meaning and i dunno how to apply wat's there... do u think im a sadist? yes i think u do... i talk nonsense every here n then... doesnt noe how to communicate effectively and properly... omg... hit me... HIT me... n tell me how to me a better man... i really dun take the hard way... for if u just scream into my head... i'll just go "oh, wat the heck" u r just screaming... but if u were to talk to me seriously, i would rather consider those that say... i can joke ard yea... but take me seriously, i would really try... god... i was wondering when i really do a thing that i wanted to do? who m i kidding? me? serious? no... it's not a joke... i want to revamp myself... n i noe it's a hard thing for me to do... u see, even i think i m lazy... that's y i need dozen of helps.. to help me open my eyes and see the world that im supposed to be looking out for... i wanted for help for a long time... but did i ever try by myself? no... how to even try when i dunno a single thing? or m i just kidding again? i dun even noe myself... who's to judge me? i'll just go... u dun even noe me... how could u say that? but mostly, if i really reflect on myself... it's mostly my fault u noe... who ask me not to learn things ? who ask me not to read and study? i admit wrong, but really do i wholeheartedly admit it? no... i dun even noe if im right or wrong? who's to differ? human makes mistakes n the slightest mistakes that we dun even noe we make them n nv realise it... not even noe whether it's right or wrong... it's based on principles and ethics... come to think of it... do i ve principles? i dun stick to one... so i guess no... im so bumped rite now... i just keep on typing without knowing what im saying... i just want to say everything out... i keep everything to myself that i wanna burst... but when i say things out.. do ppl ever listen? would u want to hear a girl crying for help? crying as in really crying? i nv been helpless in all my life... well, not all, just one quarter... arhh... i want to say everything... everything!!! i know it's already quite full of rubbish and nonsensical things but still i want to type! i want to say how wrong i ve been in the life im living... i want to do something but lazy to do... i need help but no one can help me... wat shall i do?!! i want to scream... i cried and it's no use... i only noe how to cry and cry... wat's really the point? no one is able to see the sadness there... no one is able understand what im going thru... tell me if im wrong... everyone's been there, arent u guys? sometimes u think u r a loser... n u dunno wat to do... n ppl r just there blaming u for stuffs u did wrong.. n still u dunno how to amend it? gosh.. this is so frustrating... im a sad sad naive naive, tell-me-to-go-to-hell girl.. i cannot change to another person... i just couldnt... but i couldnt go with that attitude anyway, i could get kick out of whoever im with.... im going to die... i totally m so busted... HELP HELP!!! who can HELP me!!!

went to sch today... obviously im not in the best mood, bcos of u noe... ugh sick sick sick... din talk really much... might hurt someone's feeeling :(
is that call excuses? did i make them up? well, i din... really... cos i just dun wanna talk... when i noe if i open my mouth, those coughing sound will just come out... or maybe spit will get to the ground... hahaha... no lar... not that disgusting...
did it really sound just like me or did i make up again? argh... i dunno how to talk anymore...

anyway, went to seng's hse for mahjong session... well, long time nv play le ma... it's boring soon cos we nv play money... lolx... went home at 8... n expected... got scolded for not taking care of myself... cos after getting home.. i just keep on coughing n coughing... it was well during the day... no coughing can be heard from me... haha... urgh... my intestines r coming out of my mouth.. well, theorically... cos when it gets bad... i get stitches... meaning my gastric pain.. even talking abt it is bad... gtg cya...

well... saw something in kw's blog which now make me realised...
i appreciate wat u did for me... i really do... maybe im not that fast to realised it.. in another words, slow lar... i wont write mushy things in this blog... it's just not my type of thing... but i'll just say thanks for everything n sorry, my dear...

I'll nv break your heart~ i'll nv make u cry~ yes thanks i heard it and sang it... it's nice... yea, long time no hear... oh i gotta dl it... tell me the songs we nv hear zillions times ago so i can go dl them..

ssick, absolutely... man... n no one care... sobx... u guys make of stone or wat... esp that 3 cousins of mine... if u r reading this, u better msg to ask how i am.. yea...
anyway, been sick n sleeping for 144 hours n still haven recover.. sucks... im not the worse, i guess... but still.. im sick! urgh... it feels terrible.. oh gosh... n i wont leave a single cent when i die!(guess u ppl dun want also... u all dun want my ipod, my laptop, my hp, etc..)

~I'll never break your heart~
~I'll never make you cry~
~I'd rather die than live without you~
~I'll give you all of me~
~Honey, that's no lie~

--end--

at last, 1 assignment is down. finish it ard 6 something. soojun n kenneth handed in already but they wait for me. After that we just went to taka to take away japanese rice. by that time i finished the rice, i was so full but we still wanna ve coffee, haha. end up in scott's coffee bean for a cup of chocolate... not coffee, mind u.. haha.. i mean only i bought choco lar... they drink mocha. chat until ard 11 then went home. everyone is dying already haha. so full n so tired. that's wat happen yday. felt so light after the project is done. just dun wanna think abt the others yet. like that make me stressed.. rest for 2 more days first. haha. anyway, hope u guys r fine. i heard some of u talking abt itp, i got the hair standing already. wonder how to survive during my attachment? haha. try n make it lo.. wahaha. good day.

woke up at 10 something. decided to pei the bulaien to watch fantastic four. met him at 1.30 at pasir ris, bought things to eat. then went to buy tix at princess in bedok. for those who dunno, princess only charge 5 during mon-wed, 6 at thurs-fri, 7 during weekends. so it's cheap rite. got it hor. haha. u see the no. of ppl go n watch, u would think it's a good show. normally, princess in bedok is cold, as in few ppl, but today is quite alot of patrons. aiya, movie is still movie ma. i think it's bcos of the start of the movie so alot of ppl lo... and the trailer quite nice ma. fan 4 arh... it is quite entertaining overall. nice show. abt radiation, whirl pool n stuff.
went home after that n slept my way thru on the train. i took from pasir ris ma then raining somemore. so shiok the feeling. but then i hate the jerking of the train. it woke me up. then cannot sleep liao. haha. lucky it's more than half way thru le. now i wanna sleep some more sia. like not enough sleep on the train leh. haha. tok too much rubbish liao. good nite. lolx.

yday went to a sec sch's gathering at a fren's condo at hillview. meet the guys at 4 to buy some stuffs first. while waiting for the latecomers, we went n look for shorts. lay keng bought new one at op. after that, i wanna go in giordano to take a look at the shorts. try it out but it's kinda exp so nv buy. by that time, the guys were there. went ntuc to buy the rest of the bbq stuffs needed then went to take a cab. cos we ve 5 ppl so we need at least 3 more to share 2 cabs. the first 4, including me, took the first taxi. the others just follow later. ard 7, more guys came. all in all, there were only ard 20+ ppl. we miss those that were not around. long time nv see them also.
next thing we know, it's already 9 something. so i announced that im going then took a cab home. nth much that day, cos it's only bbq. haha.. n as u noe, im a introvert ma.. so nv mix around lo... get kinda bored so went home le.

hmmm.... had the first lesson at the audiorium... went there to be the first to sit in... the other guys were having their presentation so haven come yet. dear is having his teeth and hair fixed.. haha... later saw the guys wearing formal in the aud... but i nv go join them cos im in the center and it's difficult to get out. after finish the presentation made by the ASP, i saw bryan yeo with his new hair cut.. kinda fresh but still like only cut behind, nv cut in front.. after that just find them to discuss where to go n eat b4 the last lesson. went fc6 finally n WEBS.
stand in the hallway discussing where to go after WEBS. it's either singing, shopping, eating buffet, or go Settlers. haha. we just went to the station first n went in to the train. when it reach outram, we just got down. dunno where to go also. michael suggest that pool is besides settlers so they can go play pool while we go play games. however the suay thing is, settlers is only available after 8. ppl booked it full already. so gotta join them lo... but me, soojun and kenneth nv play so wanna go drink coffee. on the way, step inside a hotel to use the washroom. kinda siao hor. haha. went clark quay to find coffee bean only to find that it is at boat quay. haha.
later on, weiseng n cheeyong went to join the others playing pool. they decide to go bugis to eat steamboat so call us to join. but we dun wanna eat. so sat n chat in coffee bean until 5 something then leave. cos dunno wat to eat at where, so walk around to get some inspiration, but those food we cannot really afford. haha. later on, we just walked on to marina square to find kfc to settle our stomach. getting hungry, we just drag ourselves to find that there's no either mac or kfc there. so ve to go suntec to eat lo...
while had our meals finished, we took some pics. the guys came to join us. took more pics. went coffee bean again (-_-) to ve cheesecake. still full, so we shared. by that time, mike wanna die already. went home after everything. glad to be home. cos i was having a slight headache there. but it gets heavier so i wanna go home badly. at the same time, i wanna go weiseng's hse to play mahjong but they dun wanna go so we just went home.
later going to my fren's hse for bbq.. but it's kinda sian with some of them going off so early n stuff. nvm lar... just hang around lo... depends on situation bah..
anyway, good luck guys. for? anything... projects, itp, etc etc...

did presentation today for phrase 1. wore the same outfit as the one i wore last sem. haha. mr bryan also the same. shoot an act out for mr. lim to watch... of cos it's relevant to the project lar duh...
we went on with our slides presentations then the guys talk abt the system and GUIs. we were too nervous so abit siao one.. haha. fazzil repeat his pts over and talk kinda slow, explaining even little details haha. cheeyong is alright except he go accidentally press the MS Word(or is Excel?). nurul is good. weiseng is ok. my little pig is ok since he's the boss, nth to complain ma... later i kena.. oopx.. i was nervous n blabbered all the way thru. i noe im bad so wasnt too happy when the phrase 1 is finally over. worse is, no one accompany me take train... blah them lar... go eat at orchard... nv ask me... haha... no lar... i dun wanna also... so tired, leg ache, wanna die liao... better go home watch SCV... lolx... dun ask me wat channel ive got... some wulu wulu basic channels then got xi ju dai... nth much actually... but wierd thing is, we still got every channels. haha... yday then come one. but we tot after yday that's it for the premium n espn n cartoon network(wahaha) all others we din subscribe... but today still got leh... yeah, we din subscribe those... not interested in espn... but now still got world pool championship, lol. anyway, din watch much. cos i noe if i watch those that is not on our list, i will be very disappointed when it's all gone later.
go watch naruto first... blog again next time... if i feel like it... or if i rmb... wahaha... cya guys...

kinda sian and sad also... dunno y... been feeling kinda down lately... i noe it's just me and my feelings... but the feeling's bad that's all...

anyway, went to pasar malam today at jp... soojun, me, weiseng, cheeyong, bryan arrive first... michael went je UOB bank. we just stand at the playing field watching as kids climb the large "bag"(i dunno wat it is call). soojun had to go home immediately cos she has to have a family dinner before sending her uncle back to taiwan. they had taiwan sausage before leaving... after that michael came. he took 79 so the bus took long. ugh... 79 take such long route... even i hate to take it to my grandma's hse. ate b4 he came... walk for a while b4 we went to buy some more food to bring home. after that just go home...
still kinda sian and tired rite now... not a big prob at home but still... haiz... anyway, gtg... cya guys...

well, i assume ppl r just busy so wont bother to read my blog... haha... so i just post all that happens in this k?

erm... went n watch batman begins with dear... i really ve short term memory leh... forgot when liao... but it was nice... i think betty also got watch rite... saw something in ur msn nick... haha... no robin only lar... too bad... i wanna see who act robin one u noe? wahaha...

har... recently watched initial d also... so sad... they change abit of the story... combine whole of stage 1 n 2 into this... no the younger bro also... that was when takumi still competing with nightkids and redsun etc etc... at first i tot edison and that guy(wat's his name) are acting as brothers... in the end, sad that it isnt so... anyway, movie is quite hilarious... bcos of the supporting actors like bunti, the gas station's boss and his son, (not quite the anime rite)... anyway, y m i talking abt this? haha...

dunno it's me or wat... but during this period, we still going out... good rite? maybe bcos i too slack... haha... so erm... after this week maybe, not too often liao...

soojun, kenneth, bryan n me went singing after sch... we went kbox but then nv ve membership card... so went party world at clementi... sang until 6 something then i went off for dinner... family gathering... i forgot to pay... oopx... oh crap, that reminds me again... forgot to return the money again... wahaha...
oh where was i? oh ya... family dinner at long beach... took 105 down there... the food took a long time to come(we wanting to doze off liao). turns out, previous night... the chefs had a big fight so were fired... see the waitress and waiters also very uptight... and the food there sucks... beneath my standards... i mean beneath the food that i expected lar... of cos... sucks lar... dun say liao...
got crab also no use... still so ex... 300+ per table... haiz...

sat camp at home.. only went opp to ve bat kut teh for dinner... yummy... n guess i saw who? bennedict... guess betty noes... the bball boy in ite... no. 10... haha... yea he lives here... i saw him with a mei mei(there goes ur dream wahaha)... i dunno if his sis anot lar... so young... like cheat young girl... muahaha... i think he saw me but we nv bother to greet each other... end...

went out with dear today to suntec... well i dun wanna say anything bad cos he's reading... wahaha... anyway, happy day... too bad tml got sch... n projects come back to my head... crap... just when i was enjoying the weekend...

that's all... nitey nite... i dun mean that as cute way but anyway good nite... haha

paiseh... been busy with fyp so nv update...(or rather busy watching anime) wahahaha... who m i kidding... anyway if there's any interesting thing to post i will try to post k... wahaha...

this few days been home to pei my family. recently i finished my show but then yday dear gave me some anime to watch... haha... can start watching again...then yday went opposite my house to buy 4 ktv vcds(he bought 2 i bought 2)... went home to sing... and now we noe y it is so cheap(24 for 4 pieces).. cos the mtv is fake... when i sing, i feel the morale is going lower... haha... then dun feel like singing man... but of cos still can sing lar... i was wondering if u guys wanna sing next time, can come my house sing ma... though i only got 2 usable mikes... haha...
went to suntec today with bryan... we wanna wait for the bus to great world city but it nv come leh...there's a shuttle bus outside cityhall rite?
anyway, went to je to watch monsters-in-law. show abt rich mother disappoving son and his gf get married, so went thru long lengths to make her daughter-in-law back off. show ends quite well, can get u teary as well... mostly it's just comedy... haha...
well, went imm to eat... walked for a while... then went home... that's all, tata...

i shed my skin like a snake today. next time go swimming must spray sunblock liao. my sunburns just heal. haha. anyway, today did nth today. slept during the afternoon due to insufficient sleep during the previous night. plus it was raining somemore. so songz. lolx. sian now. sian sian sian.

my xiao bai went for moto driving lesson today so tot he dun wanna go out already cos he very tired. it was in the morning ma. i finish the last of my shows today. despo housewives. then nth to do liao. really sian man. xiao bai also very bored sia. haha. so ard 2 something then we decided to go out. to woodlands. cos he got direct bus to woodlands.
walked ard then ate at 5. walked somemore. went home ard 6. took 187 back. the journey lasted 45 mins. manz. i noe. haha. like that i spend today without spending much money. cool huh. lolx. cos everytime i go out, sure got big money involved one. next time shall go home eat then dun need spend dinner money. wahaha.
i realised i nth to do at home liaoz. unless i dl more new shows to watch lo.. yay i blog already. all crapz. haha.

slack at home yday. watched finish naruto finally. the ovas suck. haha. took a nap in the afternoon. that's all. wanted to rest from all the aching from the previous day.
finish will&grace and charmed also. it's been days since i dled them. now nth to do le. so sian man. haha.

went swimming on wed with mike and dear. swam for quite a distance that day. we went to the regular pool at the jurong swimming complex at first, then went to the wavy pool to relax.. later on just relax in jacuzzi, then dip in the lazy pool where the wave just keep flowing us ard and ard. lastly, went back to the regular pool for 2 lengths. by that time it's ard 4.30. we swam ard 3 hours. now having sunburns on my back sia.
anyway, after that, we headed to je sb entertainment to wait for huiyi cos mike was meeting her there for dinner. walked there for a while when huiyi appeared, followed by dingyuan. apparently, huiyi asked dy along also. went to imm to eat at burger king. walked ard until 9 something then went back to je interchange. by that time, i was really really wearing out. so we sat there and chatted for 1 hour b4 going home. being with them is entertaining. a lot of gossips just spill out. oopx. haha. dun worry, none of urs is spilt out. lol.