cool! just added photobucket application in facebook!

had gone through pictures also. theres wedding photos, trip photos and gathering photos. All from long time ago! aww..

i should put one next time with all my cousins during chinese new year. In my cousins wedding photos, u see one of the photos with only the 6 of us in it. One of the guys is my bro, and the other is my cousiin, but his brothers didnt come that night. Niether did the girls' brother come. oh and the photos with the groom (my elder couzin) and his wife. his sis is by my bro's side. all cousins hah. The only time we only get to meet is during chinese new year. haha.

yea. and photobucket is alot faster to upload pictures than facebook. so with it as an application in facebook. i can upload more photos on "facebook" haha.

mata ne.

Gawd, finally feeling refreshed and energised abit.

Began to study my otia in the morning before i went napping again. haha.

just now went to meet dear at jp for dinner. he bought guitar hero for xbox 360 at challenger. and asked his bro to come fetch us home. LOL.

And,

i haven begin my eprelim yet. I didnt manage to finish studying otia and isdm. so i was thinking maybe leave it for tmr and fri to take either of them.

sigh.

probably, prelim results will suck again. luckily its optional. and its a good practice for the final exam. leaving me to feel properly studied and prepared after prelim, cos i would ve covered the necessary materials for the prelims so these are still very embedded in my brain until finals.

Less stressed too. So in a way, prelims are good for us. We could studied few months before the actual exam and den having mock exam give us the neccessity to prepare for the real one.

few weeks before the finals, i could just revised again to refresh everything in that module(s). So u'd nv seen me reading notes on the train to expo, while feeling relaxed. lol. i dont want to make myself so stressed out that i'd panicked even before i get to the exam hall.

having a relaxed mind is impt. i always tell myself that everything will fall in place after i seen the qns. even if i do forget a few points, i would console myself, saying its impossible to remember every little details of those theories. Just get to the main point, thats all i need.

den again, u wonder why i fail rite.. wahahaha!! =X

back to mugging.

jya ne..

aiyo.. feeling so tired everyday. my eyebag is heavier.

i just cant concentrate on study. although eprelim starts today. i have 4 more days to take 2 e-paper.

ive been so lethargic that i cant even concentrate in jap class. i dont even feel like going, if its wasnt dear's call that woke me up from my nap. i feel like i need extra energy for brain processing. I performed badly in class yesterday. been stuttering over jap words, when i usually weave it through the sentence structure. my brain isnt working.

Tried sleeping early. no use at all. even its at my daily hours and timing of sleeping.

i wonder if i can finish studying isdm today and take the paper tmr. and den give myself time to take otia paper on friday.

theres a last lesson for isdm tmr. but i think im skipping it to take my e-paper.



yday was worse. i went to sch early in the morning, to find out theres no more lessons for otia. since theres poa after otia class, i try to study and slack at the same time for 3 hours. i napped at the table for 1 hour and tried to study otia. haha. well kinda futile. i cant study well outside my house. its too much distraction.

met angie for lunch. she was at sch early too but didnt go for hr class cos she forgot her stack of hr notes.

after lunch, we waited outside our class to wait for her hr class to finish b4 we go in for poa.

she disappeared halfway thru class to study with her fren. haha.

j just went home after poa, cos was feeling as tired as b4. cant even study with her without my full set of notes.



ay ay. now im feeling tired as yday, even though i just wake up from my nap. i know i shouldnt sleep. the more i sleep, the same feeling wouldnt go away. but even if i dont try to nap, i would become zombie and i know i wouldnt study.

anyway, i think i ordered the agnes b bag from ebay. i just need the seller to reply me. i seen this bag and tried it b4 at taka. but its too ex. now they selling it cheaper on ebay so i took up the offer haha.

wah, even playing games and watching anime now make me feel worst. firstly, i would feel that im neglecting my studies. 2ndly, i would become more tired. haha. 3rdly, i dont ve the energy for them.

the weather just make it worst. argh!! i know its raining soon. just look at dark sky outside la. wah lau. make me feel sleepy again, although i just wake up.

now im just blogging so i wouldnt ve to study and make myself having migraine and den ve to go back to sleep again. and by blogging, its so far the most relaxing activity i can find on the computer. oh 3rd reason, my brain cant take in any more study materials. haiz. maybe i should just take my epaper without finishing mugging. cos im just cramping every thing into my head now. it wouldnt help to understand or organise any thoughts now.

oh yea, btw its just what i put as my msn nick, if i can retrieve any info at will whenever i pick up any info, i would be a superhuman by now. sucks. i wonder how im going to score for all these papers. and its only 4 mod, 2 which i ve taken b4 somemore. sigh~~

mugging mugging mugging man...

zzz...

woo going to hokkaido in june!!

few days after my exam somemore, so i will be looking forward to the trip! keke.

and updating my wishlist.

kate spade wallet!! and agnes b bag!! though its not shown in the official website.

aww.. cant.. must control the urge! =.=''

meanwhile, prelims.. haiz...

can someone teach me how to be happy?

how to be satisfy when im stuck in my tiny world, with no one but me inside?

The ones around me, they are barred from coming into my life.

And i dont know and refuse to open up to them.

I dont know what i want.

I have a lot of anger/sadness, but they are so pent up inside me. sometimes i feel like suffocating, cos i dont know how to let them out.

Who will help me?

Even my boyfriend cant help me. I need love and guidance. He cant provide me those.

I am not being appreciated, no matter how much i do. and i crave for recognition inside me.

If this is a jap song/anime, this should be a really really sad song/scene.



There is no one, no one at all. nani mo. nani mo nai.

No friends, not even my family and boyfriend, bothers what im thinking or what i want.

I always compromise to their wishes, and dont know how to express my own. It would feel like selfishness. as what kevin always say.

what is with me? I hate myself sometimes, i e, all the time.

A shield is protecting me from harm. Yet at the same time, its preventing me from going out.



Its not about going out to shop or hang out.

Even when im outside, i refuse to talk openly to others. I conceal everything inside me.



Its about my life. My whole life, what i am going to do. How to achieve happiness. What is wrong with me?

Kevin says i cry alot, but thats the only way i can let out frustration and all the pent up sadness within me. Does he even know that?

I rarely do cry now. It doesnt help solve things.

Instead im still brooding over them.

i think i would die much faster this way.



What is love? how could you enjoy loving someebody else so much, even when u are doubtless about his feelings?

Do i really really like him? Am i really really capable of loving someone?

How do i really feel happy?

What am i? Who am i?

Suddenly i feel like correcting myself. For i am emotionless. I am empty inside.

A day come and another pass. I just live them as it is.

With an empty shell.



These feelings are not only realised during my PMS.

its even when im conscious of myself.

Who am i? Why do i behave like this? Am i not human?

To be pleasantly surprised is when u r surprised with things that you like, or longed for a long long time.

It doesnt mean unexpected surprised. Oh its surprise alright, if the other party u giving the gift to, doesnt dislike what u bought for him or her.

To be stunned is the extreme unexpected surprised. Something that the given will nv thought of, come to the given as a gift. and in fact this gift is what the giver like.

Getting a gift for someone is getting something that that person like, not something that you yourself like. That wouldnt make that any difference at all. In fact, you just make that person "minus" your mark of sincerity.

And dont try to offer something to ur loved one that she or him doesnt like, but something that you like. If you do, it doesnt make that person comfortable or happy at all! Forcing it, doesnt make any better. They make it worst.

Try to get ur loved one a present that she or he likes, for a long time (to make it unexpected pleasantly surprised). When something that u handpick or made, with an extra effort, ur effort wont be unappreciated.

This are the same for places that you bring ur loved one to.

Memories should be made to be pleasant not unpleasant.



This is an advice for peeps that are getting presents for other people. Giving gifts/cards/flowers to someone is a form of happiness between the two of u. You are happy that he likes your gift, and he is happy that he likes what you give him. They shouldnt be something so pretentious that may seem as showy.

Making the extra effort make it all worth it. =)



Oh yea and forgot to announce for the happy couple, Vincent and Winnie!

Congratulation on his proposal to winnie!

May this couple be blissful forever and ever!

his facebook's pictures of his preparation for his proposal.

So xinfu sia!

i just continue stage 2 of jap basic. haha.

a combination of the 2 classes of the stage 1, so many unfamiliar faces. but luckily theres still 5 of the old us.

anyway, its wierd that my jap teacher told de class im taking JLPT. (jap language exam) i didnt ever mention to her b4 ma. haha. but yea, i would take.. maybe in august if im ready for it.

rocking.. im trying hard to read full sentences of hiragana and katakana now. still need to slowly read them and understand their meaning though.


meanwhile i start to play maplestory again. LOL! kevin was like, duhhhh! thats bcos love motivate me to play ma. Wahaha..!

bbs!!

since de girls are blogging about sun's bai nian, i shall chip in abit.

the things they left out. well, since ive got nth to do now anyways. =P

for kw's reading pleasure.. wahaha!



sundae lunch -
met yq, joanne, jj, weisheng, betty for lunch at amk hub around 1pm.

chinsher came to fetch us later at 2pm to his house.

were entertained by chinsher's uncle and aunt. =) so nice of them.

anyway, what joanne says long story is,

chinsher decided to join us while we are leaving for my house. We all persuaded him to. haha. he's so ONz. cos he was supposed to pass his fren something den he smsed him to postpone it. haha.



jiejin gotta go to her fren's house so she ditched us at the bus stop to take taxi. LOL!

we took bus and den train and den bus back to my house. haha.

dan met up with us at je mrt station.

cs were already hanging out opposite my house, waiting for us. how big are we. haha~



sundae dinner -
humble fare at my abode. haha. thats what my mum says in chinese.

continued ban-luck! after dinner. chinsher brought some luck to me (after the losing streak on chu yi - chu san =.=).. or maybe its my house. or maybe theres a "zhao cai mao" above my bookshelf, where i was leaning close to. haha.

den after ban luck, we went to play wii and rock band in my bro's room.

well, im guessing dan's nick gotta do with playing boxing in wii. haha.

everyone took turn while playing. cos limited wii motes and the guitar instruments k..

and left around 11pm.



this has gotta be the fun CNY meetups ever. lol..

hope we meet up soon b4 dan leaves for aust again.

damn.. shipping fees from the overseas are freakishly expensive!!

and they take super long to reach here! min. 1 week. haiz..

i seriously should go find something that sells in singapore. haha.

sian.

ISFJs need positive feedback from others. In the absence of positive feedback, or in the face of criticism, the ISFJ gets discouraged, and may even become depressed. When down on themselves or under great stress, the ISFJ begins to imagine all of the things that might go critically wrong in their life. They have strong feelings of inadequacy, and become convinced that "everything is all wrong", or "I can't do anything right".

Im one of ISFJs (Introverted Sensing Feeling Judging). The above sentence is true. I have low self-confidence.



In this URL: http://www.personalitypage.com/ISFJ.html, most of the things about me is true.


The following abstracts are taken from this website. http://www.geocities.com/lifexplore/isfj.htm


Loving

For the ISFJ, love means security and commitment. Again, like other types, ISFJs tend to fall hard when they fall in love. Because they place a high value on marriage and family, they seek out a partner and feel unfulfilled without one. Marriage and family give ISFJs appropriate outlets for their love. In addition, they provide opportunities for them to meet their need to be of service to others. Because they are willing to give so much, they tend to expect the same sort of response from their mates and may be disappointed when their partners do not comply. However, they are realistic enough to know that they may not get exactly what they want and sometimes must accept their fate quietly.

ISFJs tend to stay in relationships that may not be in their best interests. Because ISFJs are responsible and dutiful, unless they are careful, their partners may take advantage of them. ISFJs are likely to stay in such relationships, because their values of commitment and stability are more important than their individual needs and wants. They may be taken for granted by the very people whom they care and do so much.

In love, ISFJs tend to epitomize people who radiate warmth and good feeling. While ISFJs may not verbalize deep love or the underlying sense of security and commitment that they feel, their contented facial expressions and demeanors illustrate their inner thoughts. They will do whatever is necessary to maintain this state. When the spouse or family of the ISFJ does not meet his or her expectations, the opposite facial expression or demeanor may occur. They are unlikely to talk with others about their disappointments.

When ISFJs are scorned, they are likely to be disappointed, angry, and bitter. However, they keep their feelings inside and often focus on themselves. After her spouse had left her to marry another, one ISFJ commented, 'It wouldn't mean anything if I let the anger out.' Even though she was in pain, she held back her feelings and tears, responding to a strong need to appear composed and stoic to others.



"While ISFJs are super-dependable, they may be fascinated by and attracted to the irresponsible, the lush, the glutton." (HAHA!!) Many ISFJs marry alcoholics and then proceed to conduct a rescue-rejection game without end, with the rescuing phase taking the guise of an attempt to reform. Occasionally an ISFJ mother may reveal a tendency to find humor in the "waywardness" of a son, while raising her daughters to respect traditions and to do the Right Thing at the Right Time; always.

ISFJs are frequently misunderstood and undervalued. Their contributions often are taken for granted, and the ISFJ as well is too often taken for granted. This can cause an ISFJ to harbor feelings of resentment, and this bottled up emotion can gnaw inwardly, causing the ISFJ much undeserved suffering.



Mates

The conserving nature of the ISFJ nicely complemented the iconoclasm of the ENTP "inventor." There would seem to be an even greater affinity in the mating of ISFJ with the ESTP "promoter." The dashing, glittering, wheel-and-deal capers of the ESTP calls for anchorage. The ESTP tends to have "high" periods during which there is a whirlwind of euphoric activity. The ISFJ provides, and likes to provide, a place to "crash" for our high-rolling entrepreneur. Usually the ISFJ finds employment that requires this ministering, nursing, helping sort of activity. Even so, he or she doesn't seem to mind doing the same thing at home, and so tends to get burdened with a bit more duty than others. If the spouse does not show appreciation now and then for this overtime work, he may be in for an increase in physical complaints and "worries" on the part of the unappreciated ISFJ.

i like OSTs of my favourite dramas.

They are the companions of really intense scripts/plots.

When i like that drama, it means that the script has melodramatic meaning to it. and it move me.

when im sad, i listen to these songs. and den i will remember the dramas. and their strong-willed characters involved.

im still a girl. somewhere. haha.

so tired.

i ve not been sleeping good at all since cny. though i admit i still sleep more than 6 hours a day. haha.

i seriously need 10 hours of sleep a day. or else the whole day to me i will feel sluggish and whole lot more tired.

the face masks i bought from ebay came. =) well its an extra from something else i bought from the same seller. i just accidentally paid more so she gave me 3 red wine facemasks instead of refunding me.

she recommended the facemasks to me and guaranteed that its good.

well, if it really is, i shall recommend to u girls too. =)



i better not start talking about exams. they will spoil my mood.

instead, i shall focus on a long-waited shanghai trip with my family in june after exams. and possibly another taiwan trip at the end of the year. haha.

im the only one that haven been to china yet =.= which is why im looking forward to it.

well, it may not be as fun as going with frens, but at least i noe my dad will bring us everywhere he deems interesting for us to go. =) and i still got my bro. haha.



Hope that things will go smoothly for me this year. Niu nian rite. it should be my year eh.

i did settle abit of the bills and exams fee stuff. that lightens the load off my mind.



and well, im wondering if i should continue my intermediate jap. my mum says that my bro can teach me if i want.

its true that i dont want to attend the lesson at night. its just so.. tiring.

on the other hand, i got a feeling my teacher can teach me more than my bro could. haha. although he will teach the necessary sentences only la.

how sia.

i got 3 more lessons till the end of basic jap.

hmmm.

まま。（well well..）

おやすみ。(oyasumi. nite.)